The journey!

Haven't posted for awhile.  Just couldn't put together my thought to know what to say.  Today marks three weeks at the gym for Patrick and I.  WooHoo.  Never thought I would make it that far.  Haven't weighed yet.  We are waiting to the one month mark to get a new battery for the scale.  Just don't want to be disappointed and give up.  It really has been fun.  A totally new world for me.  Going to bed before midnight.  Getting up before the sun.  Starting to see things differently.  Totally appreciate people who smile.  When you go to a gym, smile at people.  None of you are thrilled to be there but a simple smile makes it better for everyone.  Love the people who smile at me.  Love the guy who started coming this week who inspires me.  He has a brace on one leg and walks with two canes.  He is young, I am guessing he got in a wreck of some kind.  Anyway his legs are extremely skinny, no muscle at all.  He comes and takes his brace off and works so hard.  When he does the waits on his legs he has them on the lightest weight and he still has to help pull them with his hands.  Then he gets on the treadmill and he walks,  he has to hold himself up with the rails, but he walks.  It is inspiring.  Some people have to push so hard.  Some do it well, others like me, often give up.  Monday was bad for me.  I wanted to give up.  I told Patrick the only thing I was getting out of it was being really tired and hurting.  Then this guy came in.  I can't complain anymore.  I so appreciate the fact that Patrick is there doing this with me.  He keeps me going.  He always has.  He probably always will.  

Struggling to keep everything going sometimes.  Trying to find balance between trying to have a "perfect day" and a "get nothing done sit on the couch and pout cause I can't do it all" day.  I tend to do everything in extremes.  I need to find a happy medium.  Not sure what that is for me.  

Still I find myself incredibly blessed.  I have a wonderful husband, great kids, Patrick has a great job that he loves, we are surrounded by great family.  There are lots right in my little neighborhood,  who don't have these things, who are struggling everyday.  My hearts aches for them.  I want to fix things for them.  I can't and that's hard.  These are people who I care about.  I do all I can, wish I could do more, and just count my blessings and thank my Heavenly Father for them.  

Try a little harder to be little better. Gordon B Hinckley